Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
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