do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
