with your own penis?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
