At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
smell my finger.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I will pee on everything he values.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
