We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Randomize