sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
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