just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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