I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
then he tried to convert me to islam
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
