My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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