also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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