i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Randomize
