Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
