brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
