Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Randomize
