i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
