I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
