lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
