Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
