good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
