I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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