They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
