One girl and one boy is just not enough.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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