Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
the liver wants what the liver wants
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Randomize
