You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
