well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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