I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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