One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
