i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
