Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
