We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
