I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
