Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
