my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
