get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
