But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I would ride that face into the sunset
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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