she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
