Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I smell stomach acid.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
