Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
my sisters under your porch take her home
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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