At least make sure they are 18
Why
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Randomize
