Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
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