their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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