Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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