mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
its not stalking. its research.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
