Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
