at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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