heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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