so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
