How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
