Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
