i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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